The Perfect Golf Trip

Apologies:

1. To my readers expecting a foodie related blog, I am sorry. But, one of the nice advantages of writing blogs is that you get to document other fun things along the way.
2. To those using an iPhone please click this link to get you to the full blog with pictures as mailchimp has technical issues

What makes the perfect golf trip?

My answer is: the guys you take the trip with. For those of us that have been taking golf trips for over 50 years, you learn to appreciate the good times because we have had some bad times.

Then there have also been trips where I have been on with my son in Scotland or Pebble Beach with my father. Or my buddy’s trip to Scotland with his dad and brothers that are so memorable that they fall into a different category. This trip was made up of guys that just got along. Yes, we have known each other for 30 years. We have a lot of common experiences and acquaintances. At the end of 12 days together, we just enjoyed being with each other. That is pretty perfect.

One of the beautiful aspects of travelling with guys “of a certain age”, is that you can repeat yourself and the chances are your buddies won’t remember the story. The best example of this was at the start of the trip we were trying to remember the name of the green’s superintendent at our old club from the early 2000’s. This is a guy we all knew well. Some of us are probably Facebook friends. After 20 minutes one of us remembered his first name was Doug, a few minutes later, another remembered his last name was Estes. Apologies to Doug if you see this blog, but “Doug Estes” became our mantra if we couldn’t remember something, which was often. The pretty perfect aspect of this trip was that if you remembered your buddy’s story, you enjoyed hearing it again. Even more perfect, was asking a buddy to repeat a story just for laughs.

Planning trip to Scotland isn’t easy. I’ve done it a few times and it is hard. Our leader has done it a half a dozen times and is amazing. He picked the:

• Flights
• Courses
• Tee times (even a 9 am start at the coveted Old course)
• Car
• Hotels
• He even did all the driving.

You couldn’t have paid someone to do what he did. When we couldn’t fit 10 pounds of crap in a 5-pound rental car, he slipped a 50-pound note into the hands of the rental car lot attendant that got us happily on our way…on the wrong side of the road.

Early on we realized that we would need to be careful about what, and how we told our friends back home. Talking about a trip like this can very easily sound like bragging. So, while this blog is a shot in the foot, for the record:

The courses are old

• Playing courses in Scotland you get a sense of déjà vu and realize that so many courses in the States are designed to look like Scotland. The difference is that nature and thousands of years of weather shaped the course in Scotland versus a bulldozer in the U.S.

The pot bunkers are hell

• You have love the fact that they name the bunkers in Scotland. I hit it into one and my caddy told me it was named the “Love bunker”. Stupidly, I asked why, and the caddy told me: “If you hit it in there, you are Screwed”.

The weather is miserable

• On our first day we played the famed Royal Dornoch course in northern Scotland. We started in brilliant sunshine. A cloud came through and we had snow. A few holes later a cloud came through and we had sleet. Then as we approached the 16^th green a cloud came through and we had an inch and a half of HAIL, and HAIL hurts, but it didn’t stop us. The 17^th played a little tough (and slippery). By the 18^th the sunshine was brilliant once again.
• The thing about Scotland is that the weather is expected to be bad. It doesn’t matter if it is April or July, it can be cold and miserable. The perfect trip is when you are with a group of guys that can find ways to enjoy the adversity. Sometimes when you go with those guys, you get 10 rounds in without a drop of rain, that is pretty perfect.

Royal Dornoch with sun, snow, sleet, hail and beautiful sunshine

The wind will howl

• • The common denominator in our 10 rounds was the wind. It ranged from 20 to 40 mph. When the seagulls are walking, you know it is too windy for golf. But that didn’t stop us. Some of us even found ways to putt from 70 yards out just to avoid wind.

The Flag of Scotland in 35 MPH winds at Turnberry

The walking seagull who was smarter than the refugee golfers

 

Yours truly putting from way out with the Turnberry Lighthouse in the background

The caddies are drunks

• Yes a few of our caddies may have taken a nip or two, but most of them were great and shared enormous wisdom and laughs. The fact is that they all sound exactly like Robin Williams imitation of a Scottish accent. Or, as Steve asked his first caddy: “Are you taught to speak English with a handful of marbles in your mouth?”.
• Scottish caddies are famous for sharing their names for certain shots or chuckles, such as:
  • Pearl Harbor – a chill wind came up and it became a BIT NIPPY
  • Princess Dianna – Shouldn’t have taken a driver
  • OJ Simpson – A bad slice, but got away with it
  • Eva Braun – Lying dead in the bunker
  • Adolf Hitler – Two shots in a bunker
  • Bin Laden – driven into the hills, never seen again
  • Difference between a Canoe and a Canadian – a canoe tips
  • Fidel Castro – needed one more revolution

Some of our favorites: Darren showing Len his Masters tattoo: Big Al making Chuck look small: Robert singing Steve through his next shot: John & Paul reminiscing about Winged Foot

The food is miserable

• Historically, Scotland is not famous for its food. For those of us that have tried haggis, we can appreciate the story about the guy that fed haggis to his dog and said:
  • The poor dog has been licking his bottom for a month trying to get rid of the taste
• Truth is, we had several wonderful meals. Besides, after a Full Scottish Breakfast one doesn’t really need to eat for the rest of the day

There was no haggis in these Photos

The Venues

• • Royal Dornoch
  • Cruden Bay
  • Royal Aberdeen
  • Murcar
  • Carnoustie
  • The Old Course at St. Andrews
  • Castle Course
  • Turnberry Ailsa
  • Turnberry Ailsa
  • Royal Troon

There were so many aspects of the trip that made it perfect. We asked each other which was our favorite course and we couldn’t answer. They were all great. Which hotel was our favorite? They were all unique and memorable. Which clubhouse had the best bar? They were all fantastic. The common denominator was the group of guys. That we pulled it off after close to 3 years of planning and replanning with covid was a miracle. In the end, the 4 guys made it pretty perfect.

SPECIAL MOMENTS

Clockwise

1. Steve and Chuck with a photo to show their kids what a phone booth looks like
2. Chuck and Len doing their best John Daly imitation
3. Steve researching the gorse for his next cell tower location
4. Paul playing bagpipes at Turnberry with Ailsa Craig in the background

The Natural Beauty

The spring daffodils and blossoming gorse were everywhere 

NOT – NATURAL BEAUTY

CLOCKWISE

1. Why Chuck hits a draw
2. Why Len hits a fade
3. Why Steve hits it hard
4. Why Paul can’t hit it out of his shadow