Je Me Souviens

The beauty of supper clubs is that people connect. There is nothing much more fun than socializing and connecting with people over a meal. Every once in awhile, you meet someone you know you will remember.

Sometimes in life you meet people and have an automatic connection. That happened to me a few years ago at a friend’s son’s wedding in Quebec City. I met Jean Avard, an uncle of the groom, at the rehearsal party and we just talked. For two hours straight. At some point our wives simultaneously asked each other: Does someone need to be rescued? They quickly came to the conclusion that we were just two peas in a pod.

We mostly talked about family. I knew Jean’s middle son Doomie from his golfing trips to Memphis. The first year I retired it just happened that Doomie and I were alone together on the golf course for three days straight. You get to learn a lot about a person playing an empty golf course in March. Doomie is a great guy and we just had fun. Jean got to tell me about his other two boys Charles and Philippe. How they were all different and unique. Most of all he made it clear how proud he was of all three.

I got to tell him about my undergraduate thesis in Canadian studies. My thesis was that the separatist movement in Quebec would go the way of other radical movements in North America and that over time it would be assimilated. From 1976 to 2015 I couldn’t have been more wrong. Montreal, in particular, is more French today than it was in my college days. Jean and I agreed that while I was wrong to that point, I have time on my side.

After the wedding Nancy and Jean hosted a brunch at their wonderful lake house outside of Quebec City. Jean got to show everyone the trophy 24 inch trout that he had caught. Truth was he wasn’t much of a fisherman, but he caught the trophy. Their lake house in Quebec reminded me of my grandfather’s lake house in Connecticut. The lake house were miles apart, but the importance to our respective families were the same.

(Nancy and Jean at the lake)

Tragically, we lost Jean a few months after the wedding in a bicycle accident. Jean is gone, but his stories live on. Doomie and Estelle’s baby named Jean, after his grandfather, has helped fill the void. My guess is that baby Jean will grow up to be a great story teller.

(Baby Jean and his father Doomie)

If a supper club can be a venue for people connecting, that is a good thing.

Living in Tennessee we don’t see many Quebec license plates, but when I do I think of Jean: “Je me souviens” (I remember).

If you enjoyed this blog and similar other stories/supper club lessons follow me on Facebook and Twitter and subscribe to get future blogs at www.impromptufridaynights.com/blog and check out my book Impromptu Friday Nights a Guide to Supper Clubs. Published by Morgan James Publishing and available through most channels where books are sold.

Be Both Interested And Interesting

The key to a successful a dinner party host or hostess is to make your guests feel welcomed and entertained. Some people are just good at it. One of the best is my mother. After spending a weekend at my mom’s a friend once said to me: “Your mom has a gift, she is both interested and interesting”.

My mom is going to be 97 in August and she is still going strong. Mom started college when she was just 16 and still goes to college today. Past being smart, she is a secret weapon at dinner parties. Mom is one of those rare people that really listen to her guests. She has the ability to focus on what her guests are saying and play back an interesting insight to complement her guest’s point.

(Note: This is a picture of Mom Mom telling a story at Jennifer and Ethan’s wedding. Her “stories” have become a fixture at the family’s weddings. After her most recent performance, an investment banker friend recommended she start a business for weddings…”Rent a mom-mom for stories that will make you laugh and cry”.)

One of my largest complaints in life is that brains ran in my family, but when it came to me they walked. Unlike my mom, I am not a great listener. Instead of focusing on what you are saying to me, I am thinking about what I am going to say.

Beyond being interested and interesting mom is a great cook. She is famous for her Mom Mom’s Vinaigrette. She lives in Westhampton NY and gets a lot of visitors in the summer. The local produce out there in the summer is outstanding. Most of the meals mom serves center around a great salad. The cornerstone of her salad is her vinaigrette. She claims the origination is a recipe in the New York Times, but I believe the beauty of it comes form her herb garden and the fact that she never makes it the same way twice.

If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery then this vinaigrette is legendary. My daughter Jennifer once surveyed Mom-mom’s other grandchildren and their spouses and 8 out of 10 use mom’s vinaigrette as a culinary staple. One reason is that it tastes great. The other reason is that it reminds them of their youth spending summers with their amazing grandmother.

If you can make your supper club dinner party guests feel welcomed and entertained you will be a success.

What Is The Right Doneness For Seafood?

Everyone knows how they like their steak cooked. When you order steak, the waiter will ask you how you like it cooked. It is just the opposite with seafood. A lot of people don’t even know how done they like it. The waiter never asks you how you like your seafood. It is like the old line my friend Donnie’s father used to use. The waiter would ask Mr. Berger how he liked his eggs and he would say: “On a plate”.

The sad truth is that the default at lesser restaurants is that they overcook the seafood. A really good chef will cook the fish filet to somewhere between medium and medium rare. This is when the filet is the juiciest and the best texture. Getting the fish filet to the perfect medium isn’t all that easy. The thickness of the filet will be a major determinant of how long you need to cook it.

Justin Young, my old chef at Kraft Food Ingredients gets it perfect every time. He is now the chef/owner at Raven & Lily in Collierville TN https://ravenandlilyrestaurant.com I ordered the salmon the other night and told the waitress to have the chef cook it the way he likes it. This is a safe bet with most well trained chefs as it is what they are taught at culinary school. Justin has been a chef at top white table cloth restaurants from Dijon France to Memphis. I once asked him how most diners at better restaurants prefer their steak and seafood. He says that over 75% like it medium rare.

Unfortunately, some people like their seafood well done. The bad news is that if someone wants their seafood well done, they are possibly the type of person to go on social media to complain that the seafood was dry and flavorless. Being a chef isn’t easy. It is hard to give someone what they want, knowing that the end result isn’t up to the chef’s standards.

Note: Above is a Seafood Veggie Bowl with cod and shrimp cooked to a perfect medium.

My favorite story is about a buddy of mine that orders his steak “MEDIUM RARE PLUS”. What does this mean? Pity the poor waitress that has to go into the kitchen and tell the chef . The chef is probably already on edge because some idiot just ordered scallops well done and already has typed a complaint into YELP saying the scallops were dry. Now my buddy the “HIGH ROLLING REDNECK” wants his steak medium rare plus. Said another way, someone asking for medium rare plus makes that person …SPECIAL…

When in doubt, cook your seafood to just medium. This means that the fish isn’t translucent and is still moist. A good chef will use the Goldilocks Touch Test.

When it is real soft, it is too rare
When it is real hard, it is too well done
When it is medium soft, it is JUST RIGHT

If you are still in doubt, go to Raven and Lily in Collierville